Cussing towards equality: douche vs. enema

30 May 2009, 08:52 · ha ha, ranting and politics, sexuality, vocab

douche enema office, from Toothpaste for Dinner

douche enema office by Toothpaste for Dinner

Surprisingly / not surprisingly, I have thought a lot about the value of “douche” as a politically correct cuss word. I’ve adopted it as my all-purpose, positive family values cussing option. My take is that douches are maligned for feminist and body-positive reasons. Douches are marketed to clean vaginas that are already self-cleaning, and the unnecessary douches can cause microflora imbalances and infections. Douches are terrible, urban legend birth control that can actually increase the chances of conceiving. Douches: body hating, body damaging, anti-choice, agents of unnecessary consumption. And fun to say. Doooosh.

Meanwhile, almost every other cuss word is maligned for some body-hating, bigoted reason. Genitals, bodily fluids, sexual activities… I love all those things. I need a bigger pallette of loving cusses before I can give up the fun sounds of fuck, shit, tits, ass, cock, sucking, blowing, and company, but it’s good to have a start.

Other takes on douche as a swear? Seeing it paired up with enemas is actually giving me pause. I’m thinking the only reason enemas get a bad rap is because of taboos about buttholes, and related taboos about gay sex and maybe enema sex play. I’m pretty much pro-butthole on all those issues. So then I wonder if I should be considering the sex play possibilities of douches, and any douche fetish communities I might be further marginalizing. The problem: everything can be used for sex play. That criteria would eliminate every possible PC swear word. I’m sticking with douche for now, but I’d love to hear from anyone offended by that.

Comments

I’m not offended by “douche” — I agree that its kind of a kickass cuss, actually (although one that really hasn’t made it into my repotoire). Although I haven’t thought a whole lot about the politics of cussing, I have thought a lot about how to stop cussing in front of my impressionable pre-teen and his friends. It’s hard, man. I’ve adopted “curses!” and a lot of “shhhh-owzers…” They see right through it, of course.

— Nicole · 30 May 2009, 16:00

this post made me smile alot. i could hear you saying “dooosh” in my head, loud and clear.

dooooosh!

i am personally in favor of using religious-based swears, perhaps because it’s my way of getting back at the church for their role in colonialism. taking the lord’s name in vain makes some people laugh, but i suppose douchebag can have the same effect. some personal favorites are just plain old “jesus, mary and joseph!” and “christ on the cross!”. i just might start using douchebag more now that you’ve pointed out its awesomeness.

— fancy · 30 May 2009, 23:30

hmmm… for the most part, i’ve not really been into “douche”. for me, it seems like the reason it’s become a cuss is not so much because of what a douche actually is, but because of its association with lady parts. most of the times i hear people use it, i hear it as misogynist. maybe because i hear lots of people use it who i assume have no idea that douches are themselves bad news for women?

having read your take on it, i can see being into this word. i can definitely be into you using it. it is totally fun to say, and it’s often on the tip of my tongue. maybe i’ll start trying it.

i read an essay a while back about the way that a lot of cussing perpetuates an idea of sexuality that is inherently violent. which really took the fun out of alot of good words. but then a friend suggested “for the fucking of god”, which maybe combines this problem with sarah h’s suggestion, in a way i find difficult to drop casually, but usually gets my point across.

— Robin · 1 June 2009, 22:10

while living in england i’ve become partial to ‘wank stain’. it’s so novel to me and i giggle every time i hear it, no matter the context.

i don’t like wanker though.

i’ve never enjoyed douche before, but then i’ve never stopped to savour the feeling or sound of the word in my mouth. hmmmm….

— robyn · 9 June 2009, 14:15





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